How to Avoid the Firstborn Curse
by Chellerbelle
Summary: The firstborn children of mutants have a habit of being abducted and sent into a dystopian future to grow up. Rogue and Gambit want children. Can they succeed in stacking the deck and avoid the Firstborn curse? Silly one-shot written just for fun.


**AN: **I had this burst of inspiration and simply had to write the madness that follows.

In my mind this takes place after the events of Mr and Mrs X.

**Enjoy!**

* * *

"So weird shower thoughts," Rogue said as she joined Gambit at the breakfast table. "It has occurred to me that we are going to have to put our firstborn under an armed guard."

"We are?" Gambit asked as he reached for his drink.

"Yes. To prevent abduction," Rogue replied solemnly. "Mutant firstborn aren't like other kids. Someone always wants to cart them off to a dystopian future to raise. If we don't keep a very close eye on our baby, if we blink for even a moment, they'll be gone and we won't see them again for six months. By which time they'll be a full grown adult."

Gambit chewed thoughtfully and looked at Rogue in silence for a long time.

"Damn," he said finally. "Firstborns for mutants do have a habit of being abducted, don't they? And the only one I can think of who wasn't taken into the future was Theresa Cassidy, and she still got raised by someone else."

"And her firstborn ended up being a Jamie dupe," Rogue said with a grave nod.

"I don't really get how that worked," Gambit said, shaking his head. "I mean, when Jamie absorbed Sean, what happened to the DNA Theresa contributed? Does Jamie now have Therea's DNA inside him? Can he create Sean dupes now?"

"Hmmm...' Rogue considered. "I don't know."

"Neither do I."

"I hesitate to say no, because I feel the moment I do that, Sean dupes will start appearing."

"Yeah. It occurs to me that an armed guard might not be enough to protect our firstborn."

Another silence followed as they contemplated the matter.

"Do you suppose," Gambit said slowly. "That if we have a secondborn as soon as possible, that our firstborn will no longer be in danger?"

"Hmm, possibly," Rogue said, frowning thoughtfully. "Oooh, what about twins?"

"That could work. I don't recall hearing of any mutant twins being abducted," Gambit replied. "Or separated, for that matter."

"I think you're right," Rogue said. "Note to self: get fertility drugs."

"We should still have an armed guard though, just to make sure."

"Definitely."

* * *

**Several Months Later**

Courier looked between Gambit and Rogue several times as she tried to process their request.

"Let me get this straight," she said slowly. "You want to borrow my powers so you can make sure that you have twins."

"Yes," Rogue and Gambit replied together.

"You're planning on using my ability to control every cell in my body to make sure that your body releases more than one ova."

"Yep," Rogue confirmed with a nod.

"And you want twins because you think this'll stop anything bad happening to your firstborn?" Courier went on slowly. "How do you know they're not going to end up a good twin, eveil twin cliche?"

Rogue and Gambit looked at each other.

"That's a good point," Gambit said.

"We should have triplets." Rogue added agreeably.

"We should. It's clearly the only reasonable solution."

Courier raised her eyebrows. "You two do hear yourselves, right?"

Gambit grinned wickedly at Courier. "We know exactly what we're saying."

"Plus, this way, I spend less time pregnant. Much more efficient use of my time this way," Rogue added.

"Have you considered adoption?" Courier asked.

"We have, and we might do that in the future," Gambit said. "But right now we want to do the baby making ourselves."

"So, what do you say, Courier?" Rogue asked hopefully.

Courier sighed. "Alright, but I have one condition. You need to name one of the babies after me."

* * *

**About a week later:**

Courier teleported to the estate that was Rogue and Gambit's new home. She could see that the security improvements were well on their way to completion.

"Looking good, guys," she said.

"Thanks. We're happy with it... so far..." Gambit eyed the newly built wall with critical speculation.

"Thanks for coming over and letting me borrow you again," Rogue said. "I just need to make sure everything is as it should be."

"Sure thing."

Courier made herself comfortable. Rogue absorbed her.

Sometime later, Courier woke up with a splitting headache. Her powers hadn't returned yet, so she helped herself to her friends' supply of painkillers.

"How'd it go?" Courier asked as she joined Rogue in the dining room.

Rogue nodded slowly. "It's a really good thing I checked. One of the ovum had split."

"So you're going to have quadruplets then?" Courier asked.

"No, quintuplets."

"Wait, what?"

"Well, obviously having quadruplets was out of the question."

"Completely out," Gambit said firmly, joining them at the table with drinks and snacks.

"Why?" Courier asked, looking between them both. "It's still more than two."

"If we had quadruplets, that would've just been asking for them to become future Horsemen of Apocalypse," Gambit said grimly. "Especially with my history. Probably turn out they all inherited some sort of Horseman of Death virus or something."

"So I forced one of the other ovum to split so we don't have to worry about that particular nightmare coming to pass," Rogue said. "I'll have to check again in a few days, just to make sure."

Courier nodded slowly. "What if one of them absorbs their twin? Then you'll be back to four."

Rogue and Gambit looked at each other. "Sextuplets?"

"Oh hell," Courier said. "Forget I said anything. You two are insane."

* * *

**A couple of months later:**

Gambit drove his motorcycle down the driveway to the well fortified estate. He opened up the first gate, drove through, closed it, then continued onto the second gate where he did the same. After closing the third gate, he finally made it to the garage.

After divesting himself of his helmet, Gambit strolled into the living room and found his dear wife stretched out on the lounge, snacking and watching TV.

"Sorry about missing the appointment, ma chère," he said as he joined her on the lounge. "These mutant haters have no consideration for other people whatsoever."

"I know, I've just been watching it on the news," Rogue said. "Very rude."

"Very." He kissed her on the cheek. "So, how'd it go?"

"It's official. We're having quintuplets." Rogue held up the ultrasound. "Wanna see?"

* * *

**The Big Day:**

And so, on the big day, Rogue gave birth to two boys, Olivier and Jake (after Courier); a girl, Rebecca, and conjoined twin girls, Henrietta (after Gambit's dear departed brother Henri) and Penelope. Henrietta and Penelope were joined at the liver.

"I can't help but worry that, even though we have five children, the fact that there's four bodies still makes them contenders for future Horsemen," Rogue said to Gambit, even as she looked down lovingly at Olivier in her arms.

"Maybe," Gambit said, and determined to be positive, went on: "Hopefully it will be possible to separate Henrietta and Penelope, and then it won't be a problem. We just have to protect them until then."

* * *

**A year later:**

Rogue and Gambit gathered around the table with their family and friends to celebrate the 1st birthday of the quintuplets. Henrietta and Penelope has been successfully separated. There had been no abductions, clonings, or viruses. The Mutant Firstborn curse had been avoided, and so too had been the possibility for Horsemanship.

Although, technically there were two sets of identical twins within the quintuplets. But the fact that there was two sets, and not just one, meant that they could avoid the Good Twin/Evil Twin cliche too, right?


End file.
